Bodhicitta Vs Love

If you sit in front of another and just look at the person without talking, just look. Depending on the relationship with that person as you sit and look at each other the outcome will be something that you never dreamt of. You have not tried this for a long time. If you look at the child without talking depending on whether you are, parent to the child (or) stranger to the child, if you just look at the child, reactions of both parties will be different according to the relationship. If you look at your own child, your baby, for a while you will start to smile, you start to make funny faces that to you looks endearing. But if you look at somebody else baby your facial expression will be different. You might smile at it but that smile does not carry much love and warmth as you express to your own child.

Why? You say "Oh, it's different, this is my baby, that one is not. Both are babies, both are innocent but this one belongs to me that is why I can express my love easily. What belongs to me I hold dear, I care more, which is of course natural." With this kind of attitude a very strong family unit will develop, each caring for each other and so this creates division between you and others. And once this happens it becomes an obstacle to bodhicitta. So love that is pure can become a hindrance to such a beautiful thing, to such a pure thing that is called bodhicitta.

The love you have is wonderful but the love we have restricts us from giving out bodhicitta to others. We do not understand that love can destroy us especially selfish love. But then you say charity begins at home, we must love ourselves, we must love those closest to us. So how can you say love will destroy? Isn't that strange? Just think if you love yourself too much, If you love your family too much, is it easy for you then to give the same love to others? How strange.
The love you have cannot be measured yet is kept within a small circle. How strange. Now you go back and think that you heart can be filled with love. You have given it to those close to you. Is it possible to have that love move out of that circle and touch others? I can say it's not easy but I can tell you love shouldn't be contained. Think about it yourself. If you have your child and someone else child under your care. Think about it. Who would you give the better food if you have a choice? Be honest, think about it. Now that you have thought about this, now that you have become aware of such feelings, of such thoughts, of such action, would you be able to check yourself when the situation arises?

You say that if I give better food to my own then I am not practicing bodhicitta. But once I have generated this special quality then that love I have for others is going to be the greatest satisfaction. You may be satisfied you gave your child better food and no one knows except yourself. You are satisfied but that satisfaction is not the real satisfaction. Think about it, think about your experience.

So now you look at another and not talk. You look at the face of the friend, you look at the face of a stranger, not talking at all. You can feel within yourself whether you have the quality. Try that. If you have bodhicitta in you the way you talk, the way you look at the stranger, at the friend, they can detect it and when this happens there will be harmony between you and the other. Em A Ho!

Yours in Dharma,

Karma Dorje